


Bartenders and Spies are Basically the Same

by Figgyfan14



Category: Naruto
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, M/M, Mission Sex, Omega!Iruka, Spy!Kakashi, alpha!kakashi, badass!iruka
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-25
Updated: 2020-01-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:00:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22397485
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Figgyfan14/pseuds/Figgyfan14
Summary: Kakashi is sent to investigate rumors of Jiraiya’s presence and finds himself in lust with a strip club’s bartender.
Relationships: Hatake Kakashi/Umino Iruka
Comments: 18
Kudos: 392





	Bartenders and Spies are Basically the Same

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little one-shot that I literally just wrote today. Please be nice, I just love these boys so much and wanted to put them in a different scenario...
> 
> I hope you enjoy! It’s not edited, just as a warning.

Kakashi hated infiltration missions more than anything else.

They didn’t let him wear his mask, or his eyepatch. It left him feeling itchy, too open. He couldn’t handle it.

But damn was he good at it. He needed to stop being so good at it, so that he could be out on something that wasn’t recon.

There was definitely something to be said about the current mission, though. He was investigating a lead on Jiraiya, one of the legendary Sannin assassins. They said he had opened up the club that Kakashi was currently in, but he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of the legendary Alpha, only a room full of Omega dancers and Alpha or Beta men that wanted to fuck them. Kakashi was watching the dancers, scoping them out for any that seemed suspicious. Of course, this meant he was staring at them leeringly, a smirk on his face, while they danced on their platforms or poles or on other men’s laps.

This mission was in a strip club.

Kakashi sighed inwardly as an Omega with a fruity scent and boobs the size of melons tried to catch his eye. He let himself flush and look nervous, like he wasn’t accustomed to this kind of thing. She quickly lost interest, looking for an Alpha that knew what he was doing.

No one was interested in a virgin Alpha, not even strippers.

Fate was not being nice to him, though, it seemed. As he let his eyes slide to the right of the big-chested girl, he noticed that someone else was trying to catch them. And those chocolate eyes definitely still looked interested, supposed-nervousness and all.

He casually took in the appearance of the new Omega, who was behind the bar to Kakashi’s right. It seemed even the bartenders were strippers here. The man had tan skin that was largely on display, wearing only a pair of short shorts that were easily visible when he stood on his toes to reach for bottles on the top shelf behind the bar. He was definitely an Omega, Kakashi could smell his honey-suckle scent from where he sat on one of the stools at the end of said bar. He was all lean muscle, though, his hair pulled back in a tight pony-tail, and a scar clearly visible across his nose.

Kakashi wondered for a moment why the man didn’t cover it with makeup, but he realized why as soon as a female Alpla came to the bar, grinning slyly and trailing a finger over it. She obviously thought it was interesting, and it definitely didn’t make him any less attractive.

He caught himself staring a little too long, and the man turned those chocolate eyes on him again. He let his blush double, and Kakashi gave a nervous smile, licking his lips.

Oh god, he was sizing him up. The Omega really was, eyes sliding from his silver hair, to his scar, to the blush on his cheeks, and then further down to his well-muscled torso.

Apparently, he liked what he saw, coming closer as Kakashi sipped his fruity cocktail. Kakashi didn’t like sweets, but his cover did.

“Do you need another Mai Tai?” The Omega’s voice was cheery, his smile was bright, and Kakashi found himself actually smiling at the brunette. He remembered to keep that hint of anxiety in it, though.

“Uhhhh…” he looked down at his drink. “Is that what this is? I just asked for something fruity.” He grinned and scratched the back of his head, hoping his face was still as red as it felt.

It seemed to do the trick, the Omega laughed softly and rubbed at his scar in what was obviously an unconscious habit. “Yeah, that’s a Mai Tai. Did you want another? I can make it for you. Personally.” He leaned onto the bar as he spoke, obviously flirting. Oh, he was after a nice tip. Kakashi wondered what he would do for it.

Recon missions often required sleeping with a target. If it was this target he wouldn’t feel bad about doing it.

“Oh, uh… well, it is very good. Do you think… you could make one even better?” He perfectly botched his pick-up, secretly delighting in the amusement that sparkled in those dark eyes.

“Oh honey, I will make you the best that there is.” His voice went sultry, and Kakashi didn’t have to fake a blush when such a beautiful man was so close to his face, looking at him with eyes that lusty.

“Can I also… get your name?” He asked, softly, as if he couldn’t make his voice any louder.

The grin that got him was well worth it. “You can call me Nami, honey.” Obviously a fake name, but Nami had carefully worded it so it wasn’t a lie. Kakashi liked him.

“I’m- I’m Karasu.” A little lie. He was good enough at it that no one ever noticed, especially when he was playing shy.

Nami grinned, his scar stretching as his cheeks did, and Kakashi was pretty sure he could die a happy man if he could get this Omega into his bed. “Karasu-kun, let me introduce you to something even better than a Mai Tai.” He turned on his heel and started throwing together a drink that looked very fruity and like nothing he had ever seen before.

Kakashi stared at his ass the whole time he worked, but all too soon Nami was turning back to him, a bright blue drink in hand. It was swirling, mixing blue and a bit of green, and there was whipped cream around the rim of the glass.

He was obviously very proud of himself as he slid the glass across the bar. “This is the Umino. You’ll be in heaven, trust me, Karasu-kun.” He nearly purred the name, and Kakashi had to keep himself from leaning across the bar and stealing a kiss from this adorable man.

This Omega was definitely going to be in his bed.

“The Umino?” His eye widened, and he looked at it with excitement. “Is this a drink you made, Nami-san?”

He gloried in the soft blush that brought to Nami’s face. The brunette chuckled and rubbed his scar again. “Well- yes, actually. It’s a Nami secret recipe.”

Kakashi took a sip from the side of the glass rather than the straw that was conveniently there to use. He made sure some of the whipped cream rubbed off on his lip, and he beamed when he sat the drink down. “This is amazing, Nami-san! You were right, it’s even better than that Mai Tai!” He could see the way Nami’s eyes caught on the whipped cream, and he carefully didn’t wipe it off or lick his lips so that it stayed there.

The brunette bit his lip, trying to stifle laughter. “Oh, Karasu-kun. You have-” He paused, and Kakashi could see his brain calculating something.

“What’s wrong, Nami-san?” He knew when he tilted his head, his eyebrows squeezed together in worry, he looked like a puppy, and he did just that. It worked like a charm.

Nami laughed softly and smiled brightly again. “I’ll get it for you.” He smiled fondly and reached over to swipe the whipped cream off Kakashi’s lip with his thumb. Kakashi’s eye widened in genuine surprise, though, as that smile turned coy and he brought his thumb back to his mouth to suck the whipped cream off of it.

He needed this Omega more than he had ever needed another man.

Kakashi could tell his voice was too deep, too husky as he said, “Nami-san… what time are you off work?” He felt like his face was on fire, so he hoped that he just looked lusty and nervous instead of letting any of the feral desire he felt through.

Nami was still smiling coyly as he leaned nearly entirely across the bar to whisper in his ear. “I have an hour left here. Do you think you can wait that long, honey?” His breath was hot on Kakashi’s neck, and the silver-haired man shuddered.

Could he wait an hour? He’d wait his whole life if he had to. “I’ll try, Nami-san,” he whispered back.

The brunette straightened and beamed at him, cheeks flushed a bit, then hurried down the bar to make drinks for the other patrons that were waiting rather impatiently.

Kakashi went back to people-watching, but he made sure he stole nervous glances at the bar tender as often as he thought was appropriate. Fortunately for him but unfortunately for his ANBU bosses he saw hide nor hair of Jiraiya during that time. He really didn’t want to give up a date with Nami to complete his mission.

Nami was gone when he looked back, and Kakashi was confused for all of 5 seconds before hot breath against the back of his neck made his hair stand on end and his face flush once again.

“You waited so patiently, Karasu-kun. Should I reward you?” A lusty voice in his ear crooned, and Kakashi wondered how this man had managed to sneak up on him. Maybe that cocktail was more potent than he thought.

“N-N-Nami-san, how did you get there?” He stuttered as he spun on his chair. His grey eye widened as he found himself nearly kissing the brunette once he’d turned. “You were- you- um…” he trailed off, letting his anxiety into his voice.

Nami didn’t move away from him, his eyes sparkled in amusement. “Follow me, Karasu-kun.” His voice was so low that it strained Kakashi’s ears to try to hear it, but then he was back away and Kakashi nodded enthusiastically and let his hand be taken.

He knew what he looked like, his face flushed red and his eye wide as he stumbled after the nearly-naked man that pulled him gently by the hand. He looked like a virgin about to have his cherry popped. And Kakashi was completely fine with that, even with the wolf-whistles and cat-calls that they got as he was pulled into a “VIP” room.

The music that was too loud in the bar became muffled and soft as the door was shut behind him. Nami presses the full length of his body against him, pressing him back against the door. Kakashi’s back pressed into the doorknob, forcing him to arch, and the leer that Nami gave him made it obvious this was purposeful.

“Karasu-kun. What did you want to talk about now that I’m off work?” He whispered the words, his voice husky, and it took every ounce of the Alpha’s control not to just take him right there.

Kakashi wasn’t done playing his part, though. He let his breathing start to speed up and shifted his hips. It pressed his erection even more into the hip of the Omega against him, and he let out a small groan. “Nami-san… I don’t- I’ve never- um…” His face was on fire again, and he forced his gaze to drop from the beautiful chocolate eyes that were locked on his.

The brunette chuckled, the sound so throaty it sent a shiver of lust through Kakashi. “That’s okay, honey. Do you want me to teach you?”

This Omega would be the death of him. Kakashi shuddered and nodded enthusiastically. “More than anything,” he breathed.

Nami’s face could not have been more beautiful as he pressed his own erection against Kakashi and moaned sinfully. He pulled them away from the door, letting Kakashi stand straight again, but only for a moment before he spun them around and nearly threw them onto a neatly made bed.

Kakashi gasped, letting himself fall back without resistance. He landed on a plush mattress, feeling the distinct crinkle of a mattress cover under his back. At least they were relatively safe here.

The brunette was on him in a moment, nuzzling into his neck and pressing soft kisses against it. It drove the Alpha up the wall, and he fisted his hands in the sheets to keep from tearing those tiny shorts off the Omega. He was straddling Kakashi’s thin hips, keeping space between their cocks, and the lack of pressure and friction made him whine with want.

Nami chuckled softly, grinding down enough to just brush against him. “Do you want something, Karasu-kun?” He asked, voice breathy and teasing.

Kakashi was pretty sure he was in love.

“N-Nami-s-san…” He panted, stuttering and ending on a small whine. “Anything!”

His shirt was over his head before he knew that Nami had moved, and his hands got tangled in it. Or tied in it. Kakashi wasn’t going to complain either way, letting his arms be pulled above his head and leaving them there. His jeans were stripped off his hips, catching around his shoes and leaving him strung out across the bed, and his boxers were pulled down with them.

Kakashi put on a show of twisting and shifting as his cock was exposed. His face was flushed, his lips were puffy from being bitten, and the brunette was trailing hands down his chest and over his hips in a nearly worshipful manner. He moaned when Nami finally took his cock in hand, felt it throb in those tan hands, but he was fully unprepared when he felt the wet slide of a hot tongue trailing up it from base to tip.

“Fuck!” He groaned, his voice nearly a growl, and Nami chuckled above him.

“That’s the plan, honey,” he purred, shimmying out of the tiny shorts and black thong that was apparently the uniform for the club’s bartenders.

The Omega slipped two fingers into Kakashi’s mouth, and he let his tongue twist around them, thoroughly wetting the digits. Brown eyes stayed locked on his single grey one, flashing with lust, and he let Kakashi suck on his fingers for longer than was strictly necessary. He seemed loathe to remove them, but then he was putting on a show above the Alpha, fingering himself open and moaning lewdly.

He really was in love. Shit.

Kakashi whined and squirmed impatiently, his Alpha pheromones starting to flow off him in a way that only happened during sex. He could see the moment they hit the Omega’s nose, the way his nostrils flared and his eyes slid shut from the pleasure of it. He knew he smelled fantastic, had been told so time and time again, but seeing Nami’s reaction to it, watching him suddenly break out into a sweat, was somehow hotter than anything else.

And then he was corrected, as the tight Omega impaled himself on Kakashi’s hard cock, sliding all the way down it and keening with pleasure.

The Alpha could have come right then, and he was pretty sure the Omega almost expected it.

He just groaned, though, the sound coming out as almost a growl. Nami was barely seated before he started to move, putting his hands on Kakashi’s shoulders and starting to fuck himself. His head dropped back, and Kakashi wanted desperately to pepper his throat with kisses and since sharp teeth into the juncture of neck and shoulder.

It was unbearably hot, watching Nami bouncing on his cock and not being able to do a damn thing about it. Kakashi knew he was panting, groaning, even lifting his hips to meet Nami’s thrusts, but the Omega was entirely in control.

Suddenly Nami leaned down, sucking a mark under his ear and panting heavily while he continued his fucking from the new angle. He threaded one hand into spiky silver hair, grip tight and controlling. He was so close, his scent thick in the air, and Kakashi felt his mouth watering with the want to bite him, to mark him. He whined and the Omega pulled his hair, pulling his head up into the crook of his neck, inviting him to do so. 

He would be in so much trouble if his superiors ever found out about this.

Kakashi bit him, and Nami came immediately across their stomachs, and his scent became so intoxicating that the Alpha felt like he was shaking apart as he also came deep inside the Omega.

The deep base of the music from the club was the only sound in the room, apart from their panting breaths.

The brunette hadn’t moved, his eyes fluttered closed, and his hand stroking shakily through silver hair.

As he came down from the high of orgasm, Kakashi just laid there. How was this sex with a nameless man in a nothing town in a strip club better than any sex he’d had before? How could this Omega fuck all the sense from him, while he loved every minute of it?

Nami was the first one to move, pushing himself up on shaking arms and smiling softly down at the Alpha. “What did you think, Karasu-kun?”

He huffed out a laugh, smiling back lazily and eyeing the growing bruise on the tan neck. “I don’t know just yet, I think I need a minute…” He breathed in deeply, the scent of his own pheromones mixing with the Omega and keeping him in that boneless post-coital space where nothing else existed.

Unfortunately, other things did exist, and Kakashi was suddenly very aware of a fist in his hair and a knife at his neck. What the fuck?

He snapped out of the high and plunged back to reality, grey eye wide and confused for only a second before the blade bit into his skin, an insistent pressure at his throat.

“And why did you come here, Karasu-kun? Why are you looking for Jiraiya?” The brunette above him was pinning his hips down with his own, and Kakashi realized his cock hadn’t even been removed from his ass. He was still going soft inside the Omega, and Nami was holding a knife to his throat and those gentle tan hands were suddenly a vice grip on his hair.

He had been used. Duped completely. By an Omega.

He couldn’t help the laugh that burst from him, even as it pushed the knife into his throat enough to break the skin. Nami was looking at him like he’d lost his mind, but it didn’t matter, maybe he had. He was on a mission, thinking he could ply information from the sweet Omega that didn’t care that he was supposedly a virgin. And he was duped by said Omega, and now he was going to die.

The door opened, and the brunette just stayed still, not taking his eyes off Kakashi for a second, but The silver-haired man couldn’t stop laughing, even as the figure in the doorway strode into the room. Oh yeah, he was going to die.

“The fuck is it this time, Umino? Another Akatsuki lackey? A Government spy?” The voice of the man was gruff and tired, and Kakashi had never been so glad to see that long white hair as he was then.

“Jiraiya! It’s me, Kakashi! Get your guard dog off me!” He could still hear the amusement in his voice, and that seemed to bring the old man around.

“Kakashi? One of Tsunade’s ANBU? The fuck are you doing here? And why are you important enough to get my dinner plans cancelled?” Jiraiya hadn’t said a word about moving the man off him, and Nami (or Umino?) was still glaring down at him, the knife still at his neck.

“I don’t know about your plans, but we heard you surfaced and they sent me to scope things out. Needed to make sure it wasn’t another imposter before Tsunade comes down here to beat your ass.” He huffed, still finding the entire situation completely unreal.

Apparently, so did Umino. He snapped at Jiraiya, “You know this guy? He was trying to play us, acting all innocent. I didn’t know what organization he was from.” This was obviously very off-putting for the brunette, who glared between the two Alphas in turns. He did move the knife away from his neck, though, so Kakashi would take what he could get.

“If anyone was acting, it was you. The slutty Omega, turned on by the thought of taking a virgin Alpha. How very risqué of you, Umino.” He highlighted his point by bucking his hips, and the Omega snarled, flushed bright red, and pressed the tip of his nice into Kakashi’s ribs all at the same time.

Kakashi was head over heels.

“Shut up! You were a threat!” He snapped, the tip of the knife breaking skin but not plunging inwards. It was a threat, but he obviously wasn’t going to kill Kakashi just for being mouthy. He hoped, anyway.

“Were? Am I not anymore? Does that mean we can start round two? I’m thinking this time on your stomach, and-” he broke off with a gasp as the knife slipped in a bit more. “My, my, Umino, I didn’t know you were so kinky.” He gasped out, pushing past the pain.

A huge laugh stopped them both, and their eyes snapped over to see Jiraiya holding his stomach and laughing so hard it made him gasp for air. “You two- So cute- Threatening each other- Ah, I miss those days.” He wiped tears from his eyes and grinned at them. “I can see you’ve got this handled. I’ll reach out to Tsunade, Kakashi, so you should be done here. Feel free to stay and sample the merchandise, though, eh?” He winked, and neither man could move as the white-haired Alpha tossed a wave over his shoulder and left the room.

The closing door left them in silence, just the thrumming of the bass vibrating the walls, and Kakashi brought his gaze back up to meet Umino’s.

Had either of them ever been so embarrassed as they were by that dismissal?

The brunette shifted above him and winced, pulling his knife away from Kakashi’s ribs and sliding off his lap to the side of the bed. He still stared at him, though, and for a moment they continued their awkward silence, before

“I’m Iruka. Iruka Umino. I bartend and watch the place when Jiraiya has business.”

“Oh… well, I’m Kakashi. Hatake. I can’t exactly tell you what I do, but- I think you got the gist there.”

They stared at each other again, faces growing increasingly red, before Kakashi cleared his throat.

“So, uh… you want a drink? I hear this place has a divine bartender.” Kakashi smiled, his first genuine smile of the night. 

Iruka returned it with his own, chocolate eyes melting slightly. “I think I’ll take you up on that.”

Fin

**Author's Note:**

> Lemme know if you liked it!
> 
> I live and breathe comments.


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